When I first arrived in Korea I was a tourist. I have become a resident, temporarily. Soon, I will be a defector. Not quite escaping, but definitely getting out. Its not because I don't like where I am, but that my justifications for sticking around have been matched by reason, or at least transformed perspective.
In the last real update concerning my personal state of affairs the outlook was grim. I had fallen into a routine of accepted, apathetic and unenjoyable work. My frustrations were brielfy blurred out through uninhibited indulgence, or the exploratory undertakings of a curious stranger in a foreign land.
I no longer feel like a wide eyed alien looking to take in all the 'difference' and draw up distinctions between what I know and what is new. I continue to be on a journey, no doubt. But, I feel like I know where I am going. Rather than walking the banks of a meandering stream in search of a bridge that will take me to the other side, I am paving a path with precision and a purpose.
When it was last addressed, I had no ability to wrap my head around the concept, or moreso the timeframe that surrounded the completion of my one year teaching contract here in Korea. I was roughly four months deep at the time, and the days crawled along with sinister torment. It wasn't what I had lacked to achieve with my children; some of them, most notably my kindergarten kids, had made remarkable and respectable progress over such a short period of time. What terminally tested my patience were the things beyond my control. The crying, the yelling, the relentless and recursive jabber in an incomprehensible language, that I knew would never cease. These were the things that tested my patience to an insurmountable extent. I felt as though I was playing Sherpa, guiding a goup of crippled geriatrics to the peaks of Everest without a map. And I was from Delaware. There aren't any mountains in Delaware, right? Point being, I was delt a difficult hand and felt increasingly out of my element.
As a general statement, I enjoy being amidst things I dont quite know or understand. I relish the opportunity to travel because it not only breaks me out of a comfort zone which is not so easily annexed, but because it allows me to broaden my horizons and accrue a legitimate and preservable understanding, or lack there of, of another culture. However, as I mentioned before, I was no longer a tourist, I was a citizen, an employee; and for the brief and now calculable future I continue to hold those titles. Come October, though, things will have shifted somewhat.
At the beginning of July I decided that I had to make movements. Playing for the puppeteer would no longer cut it. I had to write my own script. There's no such thing as your "two weeks notice" while teaching out in Korea. The departure period is 3-months in the making, which at some schools can lead to isolation from coworkers, abhorrence from your administration, and in the worst cases, a bounced cheque on your final payment. As I've mentioned before, I work for and with a pretty respectable crew of people, so thankfully these are matters that don't concern me. What took the greastest amount of care and concern was sorting out just exactly what the next step was.
When I firt had it in my mind to release myself from my contractual woes, the option of leaving Korea was largely nonexistent. With major travel plans on the crest of the horizon and a $1,200 price tag on a one way ticket home I had done my research and figured the best course of action would be to stick around town with a tourist visa (valid for 6-months for Canadians) and set up private tutoring gigs to pay the rent and stockpile some walking around money. Unexpectedly, I had to take a two week hiatus from work and return home to Toronto just a week later. For a short period of time i was surrounded by family and friends, gorgeous weather, and a bed that was off the floor; a sharp contrast to Seoul. I felt relaxed and revived. In the past 6 years I have spent roughly one cumulative year living in my hometown, and with no real job, nowhere to live and a solid plan to travel for 6 additional months come March, 2012, I was beginning to feel as though I hadn't considered all the options.
On October 10 I will say farewell to Korea. Honestly humbled by my experience as a teacher, and sincerely sorry for those poor sots who had to teach me as a hyperactive youngster, it's time to start looking towards the future while not forgetting the value of living for the present. I committed to myself that after University, until the age of 25, I would take every opportunity to do whatever, whenever and live completely free of regrets. I would be lying if I said that there wasn't a point in time where I regretted my decision to come to teach in Korea. In hindsight, however, a small regret has not led to regression. While the task proved to be an uncomfortable challenge at times, the overall experience outside of school has surely compensated for the rest. The street food, the barbeque, the bar scene, the friends, the travel, and did I mention the food? All of these memorable elements have helped to reaffirm my post-University mission of self discovery, and have collectively allowed me to gain more personal insight into what I want to pursue in my life, as much as what I don't.
When I go back to Toronto I will begin my applications to pursue further education in broadcasting or broadcast journalism, which I will potentially follow with a culinary degree. With those tools at my disposal I hope to work my way onto a television show centered around travel and indigenous international cuisine. Growing up in the cultural mosaic that is Toronto, I have been fortunate to sample a plethora of high quality and authentic eats from all over the world with no more than a 30 minute commute. The experience of leaving the comforts of home, being surrounded by the sights, smells and sounds of a foreign place, and combining that with a truly local meal, cannot be matched in any other forum. Living in Seoul has given me a taste for such a feeling, and I feel like it will take a while until my appetite is peaked.
So, with new aspirations and renewed drive, I'm heading back to what I know in order to prep myself to experience the things that I don't.
In the last real update concerning my personal state of affairs the outlook was grim. I had fallen into a routine of accepted, apathetic and unenjoyable work. My frustrations were brielfy blurred out through uninhibited indulgence, or the exploratory undertakings of a curious stranger in a foreign land.
I no longer feel like a wide eyed alien looking to take in all the 'difference' and draw up distinctions between what I know and what is new. I continue to be on a journey, no doubt. But, I feel like I know where I am going. Rather than walking the banks of a meandering stream in search of a bridge that will take me to the other side, I am paving a path with precision and a purpose.
When it was last addressed, I had no ability to wrap my head around the concept, or moreso the timeframe that surrounded the completion of my one year teaching contract here in Korea. I was roughly four months deep at the time, and the days crawled along with sinister torment. It wasn't what I had lacked to achieve with my children; some of them, most notably my kindergarten kids, had made remarkable and respectable progress over such a short period of time. What terminally tested my patience were the things beyond my control. The crying, the yelling, the relentless and recursive jabber in an incomprehensible language, that I knew would never cease. These were the things that tested my patience to an insurmountable extent. I felt as though I was playing Sherpa, guiding a goup of crippled geriatrics to the peaks of Everest without a map. And I was from Delaware. There aren't any mountains in Delaware, right? Point being, I was delt a difficult hand and felt increasingly out of my element.
As a general statement, I enjoy being amidst things I dont quite know or understand. I relish the opportunity to travel because it not only breaks me out of a comfort zone which is not so easily annexed, but because it allows me to broaden my horizons and accrue a legitimate and preservable understanding, or lack there of, of another culture. However, as I mentioned before, I was no longer a tourist, I was a citizen, an employee; and for the brief and now calculable future I continue to hold those titles. Come October, though, things will have shifted somewhat.
At the beginning of July I decided that I had to make movements. Playing for the puppeteer would no longer cut it. I had to write my own script. There's no such thing as your "two weeks notice" while teaching out in Korea. The departure period is 3-months in the making, which at some schools can lead to isolation from coworkers, abhorrence from your administration, and in the worst cases, a bounced cheque on your final payment. As I've mentioned before, I work for and with a pretty respectable crew of people, so thankfully these are matters that don't concern me. What took the greastest amount of care and concern was sorting out just exactly what the next step was.
When I firt had it in my mind to release myself from my contractual woes, the option of leaving Korea was largely nonexistent. With major travel plans on the crest of the horizon and a $1,200 price tag on a one way ticket home I had done my research and figured the best course of action would be to stick around town with a tourist visa (valid for 6-months for Canadians) and set up private tutoring gigs to pay the rent and stockpile some walking around money. Unexpectedly, I had to take a two week hiatus from work and return home to Toronto just a week later. For a short period of time i was surrounded by family and friends, gorgeous weather, and a bed that was off the floor; a sharp contrast to Seoul. I felt relaxed and revived. In the past 6 years I have spent roughly one cumulative year living in my hometown, and with no real job, nowhere to live and a solid plan to travel for 6 additional months come March, 2012, I was beginning to feel as though I hadn't considered all the options.
On October 10 I will say farewell to Korea. Honestly humbled by my experience as a teacher, and sincerely sorry for those poor sots who had to teach me as a hyperactive youngster, it's time to start looking towards the future while not forgetting the value of living for the present. I committed to myself that after University, until the age of 25, I would take every opportunity to do whatever, whenever and live completely free of regrets. I would be lying if I said that there wasn't a point in time where I regretted my decision to come to teach in Korea. In hindsight, however, a small regret has not led to regression. While the task proved to be an uncomfortable challenge at times, the overall experience outside of school has surely compensated for the rest. The street food, the barbeque, the bar scene, the friends, the travel, and did I mention the food? All of these memorable elements have helped to reaffirm my post-University mission of self discovery, and have collectively allowed me to gain more personal insight into what I want to pursue in my life, as much as what I don't.
When I go back to Toronto I will begin my applications to pursue further education in broadcasting or broadcast journalism, which I will potentially follow with a culinary degree. With those tools at my disposal I hope to work my way onto a television show centered around travel and indigenous international cuisine. Growing up in the cultural mosaic that is Toronto, I have been fortunate to sample a plethora of high quality and authentic eats from all over the world with no more than a 30 minute commute. The experience of leaving the comforts of home, being surrounded by the sights, smells and sounds of a foreign place, and combining that with a truly local meal, cannot be matched in any other forum. Living in Seoul has given me a taste for such a feeling, and I feel like it will take a while until my appetite is peaked.
So, with new aspirations and renewed drive, I'm heading back to what I know in order to prep myself to experience the things that I don't.
Beautifully written, and strangely honest. Hope you'll enjoy the last few months, they go by fast.
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